Weariness and the NGS
Hello,
I have to admit to a kind of tiredness that comes from somewhere deep inside me. It's a kind of bone deep weariness with my own self, and with what human life has become. Now I'm not saying that I'm depressed, but I'm trying to face the reality of who I am and what the collective 'we' are currently moving through; 'cost of living crisis', wars, famines, dirty politics, corruption. But then those things are always with us, like the realities of illness, separation and loss, but alongside and underneath there remains the living spirit of things.
Well here I stand, still alive, still breathing in and out, and yes the garden and this post industrial valley is still singing a lively song. Today its the cuckoo, thrush, raven, buzzard, sparrow, bullfinch and the chirrrup of the blue tit family busy feeding their brood in the nestbox, protesting at our presence sitting under the shade of the umbrella.
I believe that singing helps ! I have a friend named Gill who sings, she sings and laughs and runs down sand dunes. She sings in poetry and paper cuts. She like me was birthed on a council estate, she like me still feels working class, and struggles in the arty and the gardeny world of the middle classes. But she is an artist and a poet and is trying to make a garden in her remote Northumbrian home up in the hills.
I mention Gill because we talk about art, music and life. We both have spent most of our lives not making artwork or gardens, but looking after others. Perhaps that's where the weariness is ? I had thought that retirement would bring a kind of haven of rest and creativity, but as most probably know already, that just doesn't happen because basically we remain the same person, we take all that we were into the new reality.
BUT ...... The garden really does help, the singing helps and the space it gives for reflection helps, and I really do not underestimate how fortunate we are to have some space in which to sit away from the 'noise' of the world and listen to what the other inhabitants of this earth are saying.
Now the NGS......
Perhaps you thought I was suggesting I'm weary of the NGS ? Well no, not exactly, but my garden may be a bit weary by the time of its opening, tired plants and all that, so please be kind and think of the beneficiaries, but also, also I hope the garden still holds its sense of rest and contemplation even if it's a little tired, after all that's reality is it not ?
Much love,
Paul
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